Identities

We, as in humans, are quite unique.

I took a look at my dog and realized he has very few identities that he is considering at any given moment. You are either one of his family members, friends (basically my dad and me), suspicious beings (my house gardeners, postal workers, and some of my friends), or a living being worthy of biting (mice, possums, birds, lizards, you get the point).

For us identities that we are dealing with simultaneously extend from ones that we can affect(political views, religion, friends, school, vocation) and ones that we have very little say over (our ethnicity, physical height, family). We associate very strongly with our identities as seen through genocides and crusades, or even the common college football game.

These identities can all exist within us, but when push comes to shove...Which identity stands before all others?

You decide.

Graduation Looming

Now, it's my turn.

Plans are altered, dreams are shifted, relationships are developed, experience is gained, and graduation is now looming.

The once casual "What are you doing after college" questions are turning into the more serious "What are you doing after college" questions. On paper the questions seem the same; however, the timing makes all the difference.

"Do not boast about tomorrow, for you do not know what a day may bring forth" (Proverbs 27)

From union organizing to private wealth management, my plans have swayed constantly throughout college. Exposure to a multitude of fields has left me dazed...What should I pursue? What is God's plan for me?

Ultimately, I am to pursue after God and in this, glorify him. Be a man after God's own heart, just like King David.

So what are my plans? I trust and have faith that God's plans will be sovereign over mine, so let my plan be at his mercy. Praying for discernment and guidance, I am at the mercy of a sovereign God, thank goodness.

Long-term is school planting, in countries and regions where literacy and opportunities are hard to come by, in order to spread the gospel message through students and then to families.

I am aware of living in a dynamic world where circumstances and situations shift in response to an almighty God. Open to new opportunities, paths, and experiences, I am excited for what is to come. At the same time, a bit apprehensive for the unknown. Regardless, I am but a weak servant in the hands of a mighty master.

"Know this my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger; for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God." (James 1)

"What do you have that you did not receive? If then you received it, why do you boast as if you did not receive it? (1 Corinthians 4)

The Dream that was Korea

During my orientation program in Korea I heard over and over again to be prepared for reverse culture shock when I return to the states. Falling back on my past experience in England and France, I thought that reverse culture shock is very much a myth. However, after returning home, reverse culture shock has been very active in my mind.

Reverse culture shock, getting used to home again, missing the temporary home abroad, or whatever you want to call it...there is one thing in common: There are times of extreme longing for something I can't point my finger at. As I go through my busy routine, the idea that I was even in Korea and all that I experienced wisps away as if it never happened. But random small events trigger a longing for once was my regular life in the past 6 months. These random events include emails from Korean co-teachers, seeing elementary students walking around, messages from friends made in Korea, movies, and more. It's time to be honest. As much as I wanted to come back home, I fell in love with Korea. I can still see my students running around me pelting me with snow balls, the excitement in their eyes as we play Mafia, me making silly dances for Row, Row, Row your Boat, and taking Gosuk buses all over Korea. People ask how I am adjusting. I am adjusting fine if that means doing my usual routine and doing what needs to be done. However, my heart still aches for once was. As time passes, Korea is becoming more and more of a dream. A dream easily recalled, but becoming less and less real.

Forever in my heart, a tribute to Jangpyeong.

Rushing forth

Finally, a moment to myself.

These past few weeks have been a drastic shift from my serene lifestyle in the Korean countryside. My last week in Korea was spent in my father's hometown of Suwon, watching dramas with my grandmother, visiting friends in Seoul, watching movies, hiking with my cousins, and saying my goodbyes to relatives.

As I approached my date of departure, I was reminded of how uncomfortable I am towards goodbyes and reunions. While some people like to stretch these events out, I like the subtle nature of a simple hello and see you later. It may seem as though I am cold or obtuse; however, I am merely trying to flee my feelings of discomfort. Selfish, yes. Malicious, never. Perhaps subconsciously I am afraid of great reunions or departures because of events in my life. Regardless, I am very fond of those around me, but it may not appear so at hello and goodbye.

Well, here I am back in Los Angeles.

First week: moved into my apartment in Westwood, helped my friend get engaged, witnessed another close friend get a girlfriend, discovered my favorite hiking trail burned down, and more.

Second week: start school, get accustomed to my schedule, buy books, daily reunion dinners, buy and set up a new car battery for my Honda, wait in line for a parking pass, and more to come.

Busy, yes. Drained, no. I do have to admit that I love my moments alone (I think I wrote about my introverted nature in a previous post). Rushing forth, I have had few to no moments to reflect on where I am at this point. The beginning of a new year marks the beginning of a new school year, a new home, new schedule, and a career. Thankfully, some things are never new.