Update-college years

I told my dog to sit and stay...he obeyed me for 5 seconds and then right when I took a picture he lunged forward. I caught him in an awkward moment.

My home is like a ranch. Random well in the middle of the lawn.

As I was about to leave home Sunday morning, my dad reminded me that I have one month left of school. 7 weeks to be exact, but it pretty much seems like a month. A couple more weeks and I will be finished with what I have heard is "the best time you will have." Time to evaluate that statement.

College encompasses a medley of experiences that I probably would never imagined I would have participated in when I graduated high school. When else am I going to break into a board meeting as a protester slamming trash can lids? When else am I going to slap the butt of an economics professor in England after a basketball game? When else am I going to be living in the Korean countryside while taking time off from school? When else am I going to be a reporter and get to interview Olympic athletes at press conferences? When else am I going to be able to help teach an undergraduate discussion section? When else am I going to be able to organize New York union leaders to lobby against an agricultural company? When else am I going to be able to meet a student with multiple patents, a student who won college jeopardy, and a future NBA player, all in the same day? But I will probably miss one thing the most. Living with around a great group of people and the small moments of playing basketball together, cooking together, laughing, watching random movies in the wee hours of the morning, and going out for late runs to the local Yoshinoya or McDonalds.

So, college is about to finish? Finally. As much as I loved college (wow such a crazy 4 years), it is time to move on.

I admit I don't have everything figured out. But this moment is not for speculation. This moment is to dwell in the moment. College is definitely what you make of it. God challenged me many times, and I am definitely not the same person I was 4 years ago. Some people may view me in the same manner, but I am at peace because it is a reminder of where I was and my foundation.

Although there are struggles now and in the past, the past 21 years have been great.

Unappreciated Galaxy

Jay before the game.

Donovan's corner kick

Yesterday I went to a Los Angeles Galaxy game with a friend who had pre-purchased tickets a month earlier.

The Home Depot Center was impressive and the fans were lively. From casual observation, I can assume that 20,000 of the 29,000 seats were filled. Not bad.

The game was entertaining with the Galaxy winning with the score 2-1.

After going to soccer games in Korea and in England, I feel as though I have a sense of a good crowd and fan base. Due to the marginal reputation of soccer in the U.S., I was expecting an apathetic and passive crowd. Instead, I was met by a fan base that was both passionate and unrelenting throughout the entire game. These people didn't care that soccer wasn't as popular as basketball, baseball, or football in the states. All they cared about was their appreciation of the game and being surrounded by others who supported the game. It doesn't take all 10 million of Los Angeles' residents to fill the stadium, just 29,000 (.29%). While not a dedicated fan, I now appreciate the existence of the Los Angeles Galaxy, a team serving the interests of the public.

If given the opportunity, go to a game and support your local sports team (especially if it's a sport you typically don't follow).

My B

I got a B in an economics class that I took last quarter. The class was a mathematics econ class. Don't worry, this is not a sob story that we all despise about a student complaining about receiving a B.

Here is the tale of my B.

I had just come back from Korea and I was in the process of choosing economics courses to finish up my quarter. In the process, I made one of the best choices and one of the worst. I signed up for a class with one of my favorite professors who is despised on Bruinwalk (UCLA's website for student to review professors). His classes are the ones I love going to (despite being 3 hours long), and I learn more about applicable economics. I also know that I will need to process a lot of information, think for myself, and have mastery over the material to do well in the class. The next class was a mathematics econ class that I had never heard of before, but the professor had rave reviews on Bruinwalk. Every review claimed he was easy and straightforward. Something that I know, but always have to remind myself: don't always trust Bruinwalk.

My first and only motivation to taking the math econ class was because of the reviews telling me that the class was easy. That should have sent a red signal to my mind. I was never a believer in easy classes; instead, trying to take challenging classes in order to challenge my mind and resolve.

The first lecture was utterly confusing. The entire lecture composed of the professor writing down equations and proving something called the Top Trading Cycle using calculus. I was perplexed, but decided to stick it through because this class was supposed to be easy and probably everyone else was just as confused as I was. The next few weeks of lectures continued the same way, me being confused at the end but taking comfort in my assumption that others were just as confused. Suddenly, it was midterm week. As I studied and grasped the theoretical foundations of the problems, I walked into the exam feeling confident. A week later I learned that I had been given a score of 95 out of a 100. So, red light number two began blinking but I ignored it. My pride and false humility had me not showing anyone else my score, but reveling in my score when I heard of scores below mine. I thought to myself: If I could get a 95 on an exam I was very confused about, this class is a piece of cake.

Over the next few weeks this class progressed into a complete mathematics seminar. There were no longer any theoretical bases I could attach to and I was even more confused than the previous weeks. I learned that this class was previously only offered to math econ majors (of which I certainly am not), but due to budget cuts the class was opened to all majors of any economic discipline. I was not only confused, but surrounded by others who knew a lot more about economic proofs than I and had already taken similar classes. No wonder the reviews said the class was easy! Well, the math econ course turned into exactly what it was meant to be: a comprehensive math nightmare. Just to straighten it out, I am pretty decent at math...but I really had no idea what was going on in the class after the midterm.

As finals approached I began to panic. I took comfort in my study group as we put together formula sheets for symmetric nash equilibriums and other things I don't remember. Well, exam time came and I was blown away. Halfway through the exam, I was tempted to go to the professor and ask if I could just have the class graded pass/fail for me. It was that bad. Ending the exam early (I typically never do that), I walked out in complete disgust. That was the most difficult exam I had ever taken because I had no idea how to answer half the questions. You know when people say they think they failed it, but they know the didn't? Well, I told those around me I think I failed it because I really did think I failed it.

Two weeks later, I'm given a B in the class. A grade I do not deserve.

First, I went into the class with the wrong motivations (not to learn the most I can, but rather to get an A).

Second, pride growing in me after a pretty good midterm score.

Third, blaming the professor for a hard exam and the school not informing students that this class was all numbers based.

But, I was shown grace. Although this B is the lowest grade I received in college, I am so grateful. If I was the professor and a student had the same heart as I had in the class, I would've been very harsh.

So for you college students: check your heart. Not only in choice of classes, but in your relationships and interactions with your thoughts and motivations.

Proverbs 3:5

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding."

Dirty Laundry

I love the feeling of doing laundry. Since it is manual labor that results in a visibly clean final product, I feel satisfied and accomplished every time I fold my warm, dry, and clean clothes.

Since I came back from Korea, I've been going to my parent's home in La Crescenta almost every weekend. Going home has always relaxed me as I can spend time with my dog and just take care of the necessary things, like doing my laundry. While I'm at it, I usually wash the dishes and do my parent's laundry. The very small act of doing their laundry (my dad doesn't notice at all) results in me feeling good about helping them in a seemingly trivial way and also is appreciated by my step-mother. In the beginning of Winter quarter, I began going to help at my dad's market in downtown on Saturdays. Waking up at 5:30 in the morning and coming home at 10 in the evening, I am amazed at the perseverance of my parents. Just doing what they do once a week results in me being very tired and drained, almost unable to do anything the next day. They've been doing this 6 days a week for who knows how long. Beyond my comprehension. These days studies have prevented me from going, but really it's an excuse...I know how tired I will at the end of the day. Far from being a perfect son, I hope and strive to serve my parents obediently and find ways to make their lives a little easier. Man, I am so thankful for them.

In this blog I've recognized my sister and my father, now I think it's time to recognize another very big part of my family, my step mother. The more I age, the more my respect for her grows.

I still cannot comprehend why she joined our family. First, a man who could not promise economic security and just recently lost his wife of around 20 years. Second, a would-be daughter already in college and very much in love with her recently deceased mother. Third, me, a young boy in middle school who was in his rebel state of adolescence and just plain narrow-minded.

There is no possible way that these past years with us have been easy for her. Managing a household, supporting her parents, looking after new children that she didn't ask for, and a whole different household and environment.

She has such a big heart and if I only took the time to appreciate and talk to her earlier would I have realized the degree of her commitment to God, her integrity, her perseverance, and her strength. Under her care, I have learned and grown so much and I attribute much of my character to her example. This does not take away from the immense influence my father, sister, and those around me have had on my development. This does not mean that I look up to her more than my birth mother in heaven. I am merely stating something that has been difficult to grasp and proclaim for a long time. I love and respect my step-mother. Who she is and what she represents is a woman saved by grace, who shows and gives grace to all those around her.

I respect and love my parents very much, and even if the time we spend together is in silence, I treasure every moment.