Last day with Al Joo at Park's BBQ. Of course, it would rain that day.
First hockey game: LA Kings Vs Anaheim Ducks
This year has been quite the journey. No, I didn't travel very far (furthest was Orange County). No, I didn't have any graded exams (Just some Korean language and acting classes for leisure). No, I didn't have any worries of my living situation as my parents graciously let me come back home (For the record, I love living at home with my parents). Regardless of the exclusion of common past worries, this year has definitely carried its own unique weight.
This past year has been a year of rest, rehabilitation, and re-focus. I have no homework, sauna sessions at my local gym, good job with supportive management, tae kwon do class, family dinners, ministry training, opportunities to really dive into God's word, and so much more. During these months of predictable routine, I have been able to really carve and re-focus on what is important to the sustainment of my soul. It at times seems like the calm before a storm.
At the same time, this rehabilitory period has been frustrating, testing my patience, and constantly shifting of any future plans. I have been exposed to my cowardice, pride, selfish ambition, complaints, indolence, apathy, loneliness, and dependence on that which is fleeting. Honestly, it was very frustrating when I couldn't run as fast as I wanted, sing as loud as I could, or deeply breathe. There is only thing that kept me sane. The only thing that has been constant. The only thing that I could depend on. That is the word of God.
My mind, my heart, my motives...change all the time. I am fickle, capricious, and any other term that exemplifies humanity. But it is God's word that has been with me during this time. I am still timid, shy, and lack the backbone to stand up for the one who is my sustenance.
The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures, He leads me beside still water. He restores my soul. He leads me in paths of righteousness for his name's sake. Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me. Your rod and your staff, they comfort me. You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies; you anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows. Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life, and I shall dwell in the house of the Lord forever. -Psalms 23
I will be first to admit my lack of righteousness. And that is why I need Christ and his grace. I am confident because I have the provision of Christ. I don't have all the answers to everyone's questions, or at least the answers that people are hoping to hear. Simply put, we have sinned, deserve hell, but with the grace of God, have the opportunity to spend eternity with our creator. This may sound crazy, but its what I hold dear.
My future plans have changed wildly in the past years.
The plans of the heart belong to man, but the answer of the tongue is from the Lord. All the ways of a man are pure in his own eyes, but the Lord weighs the spirit. Commit your work to the Lord, and your plans will be established. The Lord has made everything for its purpose, even the wicked for the day of trouble...The heart of man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps... -Proverbs 16
May my plans be glorifying to God and that I may be built and molded into a man anointed and a light to this world. All I can do is be faithful, and go forward.
"You have enemies? Good. That means you've stood up for something, sometime in your life." -Winston Churchill
What a year off. What is meant by a year off? Every year carries its own lessons, challenges, relaxing moments, and the molding of one’s self.
I will continue to blog as one of my role models, Jimmy Carter, states in his old age that it is beneficial to share one's experiences and thoughts, especially, if one can learn from the sharing.
