Fantasy Graduation

In the midst of all the graduations going on, I couldn't help but reflect on my own.  So, yes I will admit that I fantasized about my graduation ceremony.

A little dramatic, but I feel like it's a bit comedic.  I imagined myself draped with all the honor cords available to students, confidently walking up to the podium.  At the podium, announce into the mike that I am dedicating this diploma to my father.  We would then embrace in a long hug after the ceremony.

Here's how it actually went:
I was discharged from the hospital 2 days before the main graduation ceremony.  Knowing I would be too weak to really enjoy the main ceremony, I invited  family and a few close friends to my Phi Beta Kappa initiation ceremony because it was smaller and more intimate.  After having had no physical exercise for two weeks, I hobbled around and was very sensitive to air quality (basically if I saw someone smoking, I would hobble as fast as I could away and put a hand over my mouth).  Sitting down hurt, walking hurt.  Standing still was the only position in which  I felt comfortable.  Not knowing what was going on and faking a smile, I proceeded to go through the ceremony and even managed to give a small parting speech at the mike.  But just being there was draining.  Friends who were being inducted with me asked me how I was doing and offered encouragement.  However, I wasn't very good in my responses or even accepting encouragement.  I wanted it to seem as though I was perfectly alright and in excellent condition.  The hard thing was that a lot of people who had come for me didn't know about my condition (friends of my parents). So I had to endure a lot of hard hugs and strange glances from them when I winced from physical touch.  Even when we went to dinner I didn't have the energy to enjoy it, and just wanted to go home and rest.

Even the next day at the main ceremony I had no idea what was going on.  I barely managed to find my graduation gown with nothing on it, and struggled to enjoy the moment.  Afterwards, in the pictures I forced myself to smile, but again, was just drained and wanted to go home.

Man, definitely not the graduation ceremony I had imagined.

Despite it all, I am grateful that it went exactly the way it did.  To God be the glory.

Studying habits in my childhood

For the past few years I've had quite a few parents approach me to teach them on the art of studying.  I guess some people assume a particular way of being raised will foster excellence in academia.

So, I will share the secret of my youth.

I never studied.  I don't even remember ever doing homework until 7th grade.  Throughout most days in my youth I would come home, drop my backpack off on the couch, then run off with my friends to the park.  We would play at the park until the early evening, then head home.  I would come home, eat dinner, read a novel (usually the Ramona or Redwall series), practice 5 minutes of cello, listen to my parents talk, go to bed, memorize basketball player statistics for 20 minutes (Michael Jordan's highest season ppg average was 37.1), then go to bed.  Wake up in the early morning to play some video games in bed, eat breakfast, then head to school for another day of fun.  Now, there are a few key things that I must mention.  I had no internet, no cable television, no pressure from parents, and no extracurricular commitments other than Awana.    I lived in a safe neighborhood, had lots of neighbors my age, had a great library near by, and was given a lot of independence.

I will admit that things changed drastically in middle school due to unforeseen events, but that is the subject of another blog post.

Commonly said, but sincerely meant...I have the best dad.

I love my dad.  I've written a few blog posts about him already, but he is the most sincere and genuine man I personally know.  Yes, he has many faults that are easily noticeable, but he is also quick to admit his imperfections.

He has always been my biggest cheerleader and more importantly, a friend I could always depend on.  Admittedly, before studying the Korean language and progressing in my language ability we had little to say to each other.  Instead, it was all through actions.  He would come home from a long day of work and play basketball with me every day.  He would take me to basketball practice and watch me play every week.  He watched me every taekwondo class and watched me progress from a white belt to a black belt.  Since he went to work very early, he would call me to wake me up for school.  He even watched me play the video game Harvest Moon for hours whenever he could.  If I liked a snack or food, he would make sure I could have it in abundance.  If I ever said I liked something, he would make time to learn about it and want to share the news with me.  If I ever asked him to do something or mentioned I wanted something, the request would be taken care of right away.  He's a man of action, and when he's talkative, of many words too haha.  I've seen and been with him in the hardest of times for both of us, and we've become all the more closer because of it.  He chose to stick by me; I am forever grateful.  Almost everything I think of family, fatherhood, friends, and life is somehow tied to my father.  Man, God has been so gracious.

I will always treasure our weekday evening basketball battles, our rides together in his favorite pick-up truck, his advice sessions while picking fruit in the backyard, slow hikes up the local mountain-side, our daily meal of tri-tip, radishes, lettuce, and a coke for almost a year, my breakdown after the 7th grade awards ceremony and subsequent redemption....and so many more memories that need to be left unsaid or else I will start crying.

I sincerely hope that one day my children will  think of me as I think of my father.

What a City!

These days I've been driving quite a bit around Los Angeles.  On a day to day level, I'll be passing through downtown and east LA to get to Marina del Rey/Westchester.  Then I'll head to Los Feliz and maybe sneak in a short hike at Griffith.  After studying at starbucks if I forego Griffith, I'll head to Glendale for jiu jitsu.  And then to finish it off I'll be driving through the mountains back home.  Although many parts of LA are missed on this daily schedule, it does expose me enough to be able to appreciate the melting pot that is our city. 

I have lived in Los Angeles for all my life, minus 10 months.  Growing up in a one of Los Angeles' many suburban communities, I grew up in a small town environment on the border of one of the largest cities/counties in the world (by population).  When considering colleges to attend, I ultimately decided on UCLA for a few simple reasons.  1) Allowed me to be close to my family, 2) Great dorm food (I'm serious), 3) Beautiful campus.  Despite having had lived in Los Angeles for 18 years of my life and thinking I knew Los Angeles, I soon discovered that the longer I live here, the less I know about the city.  LA never ceases to surprise me.

I love Los Angeles.  Travelling and living in other countries throughout college exposed me to great foreign cultures and cities; however, at the end of the day...I miss LA.  

Perfect Snapshot:

A few weeks ago Staples Center in Downtown Los Angeles hosted playoff games, not day by day, but hour by hour!  We had 3 teams in the playoffs, all playing on the same weekend, and all with home games.  The Los Angeles Lakers, Los Angeles Clippers, and Los Angeles Kings.  NOWHERE else is that going to happen.  

We have beautiful beaches, great hiking trails, desserts and snow covered mountains nearby, amazing universities, an eclectic mix of cultures (and that means FOOD!), an endless supply of activities, events, and venues to check out, and yeah.  If you want to go to an island, then head on over to Catalina for some great cuba diving and golf!  Basically, if you're bored in LA...it's your fault for not going outside.  

We have the best jiu jitsu practioners, a plethora of running clubs and random groups, pickup basketball games going on all the time, beautiful people, ...ok I'm going to stop listing all the great things going on here.  

Yes, you only need to take one trip down Skid Row to see that Los Angeles isn't perfect.  The public transportation isn't the most efficient.  Traffic sucks.  Some communities are not safe to visit.  Materialism and idols are worshiped everywhere.  Definitely a reminder that we ain't in heaven.

Little Tokyo, Glendale, Burbank, Hollywood, Westwood, Beverly Hills, Santa Monica, Downtown, Koreatown, East LA, Pasadena, Eagle Rock, Culver City, Venice....man...what a city!

Memorial Day reflection

There are some people who get confused between Labor Day and Memorial Day, or see Memorial Day as just another excuse to have a barbeque or hunt for sales in retail stores.

Memorial Day originates in the tradition to honor fallen Union soldiers of the Civil War.  It has since then evolved into honoring all soldiers who have died in war.

So, other than the obvious reason of Memorial Day coming up...why do I want to blog about this?

As a future Naval Officer, I often have to respond to questions and inquiries from friends and acquaintances on why I want to join the military.  I like to think of myself as an idealist, as a realistic idealist.  I am certain that those who have been in war are the ones who are most against war.  Soldiers have been exposed to what war can do; thus, are the ones who can give a real perspective on how brutal and chaotic battle can be.  And I hope in the midst of that chaos, there will be idealistic officers leading from the front, serving their men, and serving their country.

Recently a co-worker got on the topic of mercenaries and the private security forces being used regularly in the conflicts in Afghanistan and Iraq.  He praised their training and technology, and especially their pay.  When I brought up that many of those who are serving in the U.S. military are just as deserving, and more so, than the mercenaries.  He replies and says there's no difference between the private security soldier and the solider of the nation's military.  He told me that only foolish and uneducated individuals would choose to join the nation's military unless it was for the purpose of becoming a private security soldier and being paid hundreds of thousands of dollars.  I then asked him, "what about those who join for the purpose of serving their country, it's national security, and your freedom?"  Whether they are less or more educated has no bearing on the value of their desire to serve their country or their own personal value.

Another recent event that irked me was the response of a girl who was struggling to find a job.  A friend advised her to join the military.  To which she responded, "Only people who can't find jobs go to the military.  That's why so many of my guy friends are joining in this economy."  Alright, there may be many cases in which people join out of necessity due to bad job prospects.  But that does not discount the worth of their commitment or make what they do any less important than what you do.  And come on, show some respect.

People always ask me...why?  At my age, I rarely hear people ask people why they want to become doctors, teachers, chefs, or most other professions.  But for some reason whenever someone says I want to join the military...the question is...why?  Not a curious why, but a why which comes across as why would anyone voluntarily choose to do what you want to do.  Now, a response is definitely warranted.  People deserve to know why individuals choose to join the military, the force that carries out national policy and protects the country.  People deserve to know why military personnel joined and chose to fight for their country.  But I do find it saddening that such a negative view is attributed to our nation's soldiers: current and prospective.

Yes, I've been irked by some recent comments made by others.

To which I say: "If not me, then who?"

http://online.wsj.com/article/SB10001424052702303610504577419973285034422.html?KEYWORDS=travis+manion

Let us take the time to remember the cost that has been paid and is continuing to be paid by our nation's soldiers.

Sailor's Creed


I am a United States Sailor.


I will support and defend the Constitution of the United States of America and I will obey the orders of those appointed over me.


I represent the fighting spirit of the Navy and those who have gone before me to defend freedom and democracy around the world.


I proudly serve my country's Navy combat team with Honor, Courage, and Commitment.


I am committed to excellence and the fair treatment of all.

Son of a farmer boy

Tonight at dinner I couldn't help but smile as I watched my dad share his farming stories for the millionth time.  Stories revolved around taking rare and treasured trips to the city with my grandfather, waking up at 4am every day to go take care of livestock, walking hours to school, harvesting vegetables, or hunting small animals.

I've always been supportive of protecting and documenting family history, and was further encouraged to do so upon hearing that my pastor had completed a genogram for his family.

Well, I decided to do the same, and am very glad to have started documenting my family's history.

That point being pushed to the side, I love being the son of my father.  He doesn't have many hobbies, and is simplistic in speech and thought.  His ideal day would be picking fruit, eating fruit, hiking, and watching a movie.  His love language is definitely serving others, and he isn't the greatest at verbal articulation of the love he feels for others.  He's the type of guy who will be praying over you when he thinks you're asleep, making sure the house is stocked with all the snacks you like, throwing away the trash in my room, and who will follow through on any request you make...immediately.  He's the type of guy who's easily taken advantage of and lives his life in hopes of never burdening anyone.  Yes, he doesn't think too deeply or have much academic potential, but his work ethic and integrity are bar none.

As the son of a farmer, and a former farmer himself, he always has random tips about vegetables and fruit to share, as well as the proper way to take care of land.  He's imparted so much over the years, that I feel as though I am also a farmer boy at heart.  I love the countryside and respect the simple yet incredibly unpredictable nature of farming.  This can apply to farming crops, raising livestock, fertilizing the land, and more.  With the heart of a farmer, but not in the typical farming environment, what can I farm?  Or in other words, what am I raising/cultivating/growing around me?  Boy, I am super thankful to be the son of a farmer boy.

Strange complaining

Today was a strange day.  Honestly, today my heart was filled with complaining.

My job isn't difficult.  It's also through a temp agency, so it's not very secure.  So what have I been doing every day for the past month?  I'm a medical coder for UCLA.  What the heck is that?  I had no idea until I started.  In a nut shell, I audit hundreds of hospital bills a day.  This encompasses researching procedures, diagnosis, physicians, charges, etc etc.  Basically making sure everything is correct so that insurance companies cannot find any excuses to avoid paying the doctors and the hospital.  I haven't met anyone here who really likes their job, and everyone pretty much keeps to him or herself.  As a guy who likes entertainment, I often spice things up by pulling pranks on coworkers...such as something innocent like leaving a huge pile of rubber bands on a co-worker's keyboard. Yes, I'm that guy.

Today I began to ask myself: Why am I here?  Out of everywhere, why the heck am I here? 

The funny thing is that one month ago I was saying wooo hooo, I got a good temp job! 

So, how did I end up here?  I definitely would not have imagined myself to be a medical coder 2 years out of college.

A few of my friends know that during my junior year of college, I avoided joining an investment bank on a full-time basis and decided to dedicate myself to labor rights.  I was set on working at a regular job for 2 years, writing a book, (kinda like Barbara Ehrenreich), then heading off to law school for a career in private public interest or maybe the state department.  Then plans changed, things happened, and I went many different routes. 

So why the complaints today?  It was triggered by me reading about the lunch menu at my friend's company.  Ridiculous eh? 

Thoughts kept entering my mind about how I could go into consulting, investment management, or high tech strategy if I just reach out to the contacts I had established during my college years.  I kept thinking how much $$ I could've had, and how much I should have had I actually gone along with the offers that had come my way in the past.  Then I realized what a fool I was.

On a practical level, I am working here right now because of the long wait and process of becoming a Naval Officer.  And I don't want to have a firm invest heavily into me only to have me leave in a short amount of time.  That would be very selfish, and I wouldn't be able to go through with it (I was actually given an offer a few months ago for a well-paying career job, but declined once I heard about my final selection for Naval Officer School).  On another level, God has me where I am for a reason.  In the past 2 years I've been able to spend most evenings with my parents, witness the spiritual re-birth of my sister, build stronger relationships with close friends, obtain my taekwondo 2nd degree black belt, take the GMAT, truly evaluate whether I want to go to law school, get my motorcycle license + scuba diving certification, discover jiu-jitsu, develop healthy eating habits, learn how I like to dress haha, go through the teach for america process, consciously decide not work for an alphabet agency in my early years, build my public speaking abilities, recognize the importance of church, and greatly strengthen my relationship with God.  God has allowed me to really learn a lot about myself during this time...because I finally had the time to settle down and find out.

And it's funny how what I had wanted my junior year of college actually has happened.  I am at a place where a lot of people are not happy with their job, and I really get to understand the common fight to survive on a budget that so many people experience. 

Dang...God, thank you for training me.  Thank you for allowing me to even notice my complaining attitude today.

Life is funny. ^_^  Take the world seriously, but don't take yourself too seriously.